"Dream on, dream on...dream until your dreams come true." - Aerosmith
Miles Ran: 517.98 Dollars Raised: $3,562.60
I actually fell asleep last night after I started to type my entry--so forgive me for not being timely!
I want to start off by saying, that yesterday was THE most amazing and challenging day of my life. Never have I ever felt so loved, so much pain, and so much determination to push through that pain than yesterday. It was a completely surreal experience, that I can say is the biggest accomplishment of my life. Secondly, I couldn't have done it without the support of all the people around me. You all helped me believe in myself like I never thought possible, and helped me reach my charity and physical goals. Yesterday, I pushed my mind and body to the absolute limit, and would do it all over again. I have no regrets.
I'll try to put into words as best as possible what went on throughout Marathon Monday, April 19, 2010.
I went to bed at 10:30 the night before after having dinner with my family, and woke up at 1:00, 2:00, 3:00, and 4:00. I felt like I had solid sleep in between
those breaks, so at least that was good. I woke up for good at 5AM and went through the motions of getting my clothes together, eating my bagel with almond butter and banana, and drinking some water. I made my way to the T, and of course, missed it by about 30 seconds, but luckily had two other runners to talk to and get anxious with about another train coming. When I finally got on the T, I called Katharine to confirm our meeting spot, and all of sudden--it hit me. As more and more people with yellow bags started to get on the train the butterflies began. I felt like I was going to throw up. I thought, "I'm really doing this! I'm going to run THE Boston Marathon today."
I finally arrived at Park Street and Katharine was right there waiting for me. I was in awe of how many people were all there, waiting to board the buses to Hopkinton. We got in a huge line that wrapped around the T entrances and up towards the church. The weather, thankfully, was clear, and just a little cool as we were waiting around, standing still. But once we got onto the buses the
warmth was amazing. The bus ride was...interesting. It was nice to take them as part of the experience, and because it probably would have been tough to navigate through the closed off streets, and I felt confident that on this bus, I would arrive in time. However, the seats were really tight and uncomfortable, and the ride took FOREVER. Of course, idle time on a bus means more time to think about what your body is going to endure that day and thoughts of self-doubt start to creep in. It took so long that two people actually got off the bus and ran into the woods because they had to go to the bathroom so badly, and then were able to get back onto the same bus. When we finally arrived at Athlete's Village, they couldn't just drop us off at the entrance, but had to pull alllllll the way around and make us get off and walk.
When we did enter the village, you were finally able to conceive what 25,000+ people looked like--absolute madness. If I had one complaint about Athlete's
Village it's that it wasn't organized very well. I never received any paperwork of the layout of it, so when we first approached the field of people we thought, "is this it"? We got in a ridiculously slow line for the disgusting Porto-Potties, and then realized that, actually, there was entirely other field around the corner where the majority of the people were, including our charities. I ended up calling Rick because we were completely lost and had no idea where the charity area was where we would be able to drop off our bags. We finally found them in the back corner, and where I was looking for tents, were a few banners hung up at eye level on a wire fence... I was SO gracious though to have them there because volunteers brought our bags directly from Athlete's Village to the Westin, so we would not have to deal with finding them on the buses after the race. Something that I did differently yesterday that I've never done before was completely grease up my body with Body Glide. Usually I'll just put in on spots that rub, like my calves, but I put it all over my toes, on my arms, my calves, around my sports bra, and did not have ONE blister at the end of the race! At this time, the sun was making us feel so warm, that I only needed to wear my hoodie over to the starting line that I would eventually shed. On of Rick's great tips was not to wear your race shoes to Athlete's Village and only put them on when you're on the pavement on the way to the starting line. So I wore an old pair of kicks, with no insoles, which were great because the ground was wet and muddy from all the rain this past weekend. I was able to change my sneakers and shed the old ones as well. What was nice was that all the clothes and sneakers that are shed are picked up, and then donated to the homeless!
We made our way past Hopkinton homes, filled with children waving, men looking out their front doors in their bathrobes with their coffee, and even a tent set up
with free band aids, water, etc. I told Katharine my feet felt like they were walking on clouds. Maybe it was the adrenaline, who knows. When we got to our corral some woman actually grabbed my arm because she only saw part of my bib number and thought I was in the wrong corral--WOAH! We packed in tight like sardines with all of the other runners and were commenting on the funny sayings people had on their shirts. "Like my running? Call 617-555-5555" "I'm favored to win" "Stop looking at my butt!" There were many others dedicating their shirts to loved ones, mine said "NO REGRETS!" I also took one of the pink roses from the bouquet my girlfriends sent me and secured it in my hair for the entire run.
Katharine and I squeezed each other's hands as we approached the starting line, started our watches, and yelled "Here we go!!!" We took off at what felt like a really comfortable speed, varying from 8:45-9:15. I felt like I was just jogging. There was not one point, even in those beginning miles, that there were not people lining the streets yelling, "You can do it, SAMMY!" The start was just amazing. Looking up ahead it just looked like a huge dipping wave of people floating up and down. The first seven miles just flew by, I remember looking down at my watch at one point, seeing it had been over an hour, and thinking, "I'm a quarter of the way done." The first person I saw was a coworker of mine, Libby, who was volunteering at the 7 mile water stop on the left hand side. I spotted her about halfway down the line and went straight to her--"LIBBYYY!" and she handed me water with a pat on the back, "SAM! You're lookin great!"
Next up, I was on the lookout for my family, who were going to be around mile 9 in Natick. I knew which balloons to look for--but when I actually saw them from afar, I was ecstatic. Katharine and I were able to pause for a minute, get some pretzels and jelly beans, give hugs, take a quick picture, and then were off with an "I LOVE YOUUUU!!!!"
Now, here is where I think we got a little ahead of ourselves. We started to pick up the pace a little bit, which was fine, and were going anywhere from an 8:30-9:00 pace. At times I felt like I was getting a little bit fuzzy, most likely from losing and not replenishing the amount of salt in my body. It was kind of scary. I just know of some of the things that can happen to people during a marathon (dehydration and cardiac arrest to name a few...) and those thoughts were creeping into my head. For a couple of those miles in the middle my brain kept telling me how easy it would be to give up. I was having a total battle with it, but just kept fighting. Thank goodness Katharine and I stuck together for so long. I feel like we really motivated each other to keep going--even if we maybe should have slowed down just a tiny bit. When we reached the halfway point at Wellesley College I started to get really emotional for the first time in the race. It was just such a landmark, and it was kind of amusing to see how the women runners kind of migrated to the left as the men veered to the right to get closer to the screaming girls with signs that had variations of "KISS ME I'M _____"
I was also appreciating at this point in the race having had run the 20-mile charity run very much. Coming up to points and thinking "I remember this!" or "there's a big downhill up here" really helped me mentally prepare and recognize what was ahead. If and when I do another marathon elsewhere, I will be SURE to at least drive the course, and hopefully run on parts of it beforehand, just to know what to expect.
When we got to Mile 15, I was able to spot and flag down Rick who was amidst the runners. The conversation went like this:
Me: RICK!!! RICKKKK!!!
Rick starts running backwards next to me.
Rick: SAM! Take out your headphone and listen to me. These next two miles are going to be the most important two miles of the course. Focus on your form. Then when you get to Mile 17 at Heartbreak Hill you'll be in the single digits to Boston. You can do this!
Me: OK! Thank you so much!
It was just what I needed. From that point on, nothing else mattered besides keeping my form in check, and that's what I believe carried me to the finish line without having to stop and walk. Around Mile 16 Katharine pulled over. Her hip and her back had been paining her earlier, and this time, she made me continue on without her while she walked. Turning that corner onto to Heartbreak Hill where the Newton Fire Station is without her was really sad. It was something that we had talked about, that turn, for weeks. As I started to make my way up that first hill my quads were NOT happy with me. In fact, it felt like they were going burst through my skin. It was definitely a mental game at that point. I just had to tell myself to "get comfortable with being uncomfortable." It was like I had to acknowledge the pain, accept it, and just freaking deal with it. At about mile 19, I was halfway up Heartbreak Hill when I knew I needed to stop and replenish with some pretzels. I know we're not supposed to take things from people on the side of the road, but this family was at the perfect spot for me to accept a Dixie cup of water to wash down the food. The woman said to me, "How are you holding up? Are you ok?" and I just, "well, I KNOW I'm going to finish!" At that point I was so close, and so confident, I just knew I was going to do it, and it was exciting. I don't even remember that last, steep, climb of Heartbreak. Usually it's the most challenging part for me, but if I remember correctly I just put my head down, and trudged on, and the pain in my quads just cancelled out everything else that was going on around me, and then... it was over.
Now, that was the farthest I had ever run prior to the Marathon, I had never gone past this point of 21+miles, so I was relying on the crowds to carry me through this area that I was so familiar with--but not so familiar with running on with such aches and pains. Coming down those little hills around Boston College were AWFUL, when previously running on them was no problem. And also, Boston College = LOTS of drunk idiots. At this point, I was exhausted, my legs were spent, my feet were sore, I just wanted to get to the end--yet I had people spilling into the street, screaming for me (in slurred, belligerent words) and I just wanted to get past them. They were annoying the crap out of me! At some points along the course, especially where I knew there would not be any of "my people" it was really helpful having my name on my shirt, but right now, I wish I didn't. Finally I got past them and had another slight, painful downhill to Cleveland Circle, and then made that left onto Beacon Street.
Ahhh...my home turf. Before this point, I had thrown my pace to the side and was just focusing on trying to be as comfortable as possible in my stride, but this was where I slowly started to pick up my pace again to between 9:00-10:00 miles. A little ways down I saw my friend Peter out on the side on the road, we spotted each other, and I just ran and jumped into his arms as if all of a sudden my legs didn't hurt anymore. I was SO happy to see him after that horrible, painful, past five miles, seeing him gave me the energy I needed to make it through. He said, "YOU'RE DOING AMAZING! KAY (his sis) IS UP AHEAD AT TRADER JOES"! From then on, it almost seemed as though every half mile I was seeing someone else that I knew. It was incredible. It's like, when you make that turn onto Beacon, you can start to see the Prudential building, and it looks SO CLOSE, but you still have 3 miles to go! I saw Kevin and Jen from work, then Kay, then Emily Lauren Emma and Kate from work. It hit me that, I AM GOING TO FINISH THIS! You go down under the Mass. Ave. overpass (whoever decided to do that instead of having us continue going straight needs a slap...) and when you come up you're right at Hereford. I could see Anna-Ruth's light purple balloon sticking out around the corner, she looked so exhausted from manning her post for hours that when it finally struck her that I was right in front of her she seemed so shocked! She was the last person I saw that carried me through to that turn on Boylston, and from then on, I just had my eyes set on one thing--that finish line. Apparently my Mom saw me again, but I didn't notice, I scanned the bleachers a little bit for my grandparents, but didn't see them, and just looked at that beautiful banner up ahead. I raised my arms high, clenching my fists--
I DID IT! I RAN THE BOSTON MARATHON!
I was so overwhelmed. I didn't cry like I thought I would, except I almost did when the medical people told me I couldn't look inside the tent to see if Clark was in there. Seriously?! I just ran 26.2 miles people! Don't deny me of anything! I walked, and walked and walked, barely, I got my mylar blanket
(which I could have used like, 10 of) and went to some very nice old woman to receive my medal. I tried eating some of my bagel because I was starting to feel very dizzy, but couldn't stomach it, and my mouth was too parched to swallow it. Then we had to walk what felt like a mile, but I'm sure was not, around the corner to the family meeting area. I was just so tired I could have crumbled to the ground, which I did after I saw my Mom and gave her the biggest hug ever. She wrapped me in her big coat and helped me down to sit on a curb where I just lay while she rubbed my legs. Clark actually found us and gave me the first whole thing I could stomach--an Oreo :) Then we met up with Dad, Granny and Pop-Pop to make our way over to the Westin for the post-party. My friend Jennie and her hubby Mike met us there, which was so nice, and then I was able to claim a nice big couch to relax and have chocolate milk brought to me haha Rick was the first person I saw when I walked in, who gave me a huge hug, and just made me feel so deserving
of this accomplishment. He's absolutely the best. My family were so excited to meet this man that has inspired and motivated me so much, and said he was exactly the type of person they imagined. I was so excited to see Katharine there in one piece, who actually finished ahead of me by 4 minutes--so she must have passed me while I was in my slow slump on Heartbreak Hill. I was so proud of her for pulling through. Seeing all of my teammates there just brought me so much joy. You run and fundraise with these people for months, and we ALL finished! It was amazing to see everyone with their families, proud of themselves and each other.
I was able to take a shower there and then we headed off to the Laurel Grill for dinner where I had my celebratory glass of champagne, lobster bisque, a huge tasty burger, and a brownie sundae. Overall, it was just an incredible, surreal, amazing day. I can, and can't, believe that I did it. I never imagined myself being able to excel at something like running--something I used to HATE doing when I was younger. It has made me believe in myself, have something to be passionate about, has made me healthier (mind, soul, and body), has given me better self-esteem, has made me part of a community and friendships, and has just made me a better person and enriched my life. In the past year I went from being in a very unhealthy state, to running a 5K, two 5-mile races, a 7-mile race, two half-marathons, raised $3,560+ for an amazing charity, and ran THE Boston Marathon. I am very proud of myself :)
Now, I just have to keep dreaming new dreams...